it is 9 PM and i must go to bed bluurgh i promised to adit before on the phone because suddenly i had this weird pain at my right stomach errr what's wrong? blah! but i think i really need to go to sleep, i didn't have much time to sleep last night and if i sleep fast tonight, i'll be able to wake up early, around 4 AM, so i can study chemistry for the test uurgh wish me luck! :) so so so after this i'll go downstairs to have a drink than go to bed huff if that sooo, Bye! :)

well, here i am, posting another post hahahaha i'm calling adit now, wanna say hello? :P hihihi err he asked me to call him because he has no credits hahaha he has two phone numbers and none with credits zz hahaha however, i'm helping him with the math hw hahaha i'm not that smart actually, but i'm better than him :P kidding! he passed the first math exam and i didn't blahhhh hahahahaha it's not the first time we do homework on the phone, even somehow i don't really like it bbbut it's fun hihihi i think i'll be off again soon. it's kinda hard to type, talk, and sing hahaha Bye!

fuaahhh, i just got home from school, no one at home blahhhh but i must to do things! i must study for my chemical test tomorrow errr i think i forget the material zz then i must continue my math and pkn hw blaaahhhhhh well, i want to copy adit's biology hw too hihihi he lent me his book this morning blablabla i just sign in for a while, i think i'll be back at night but i'm not sure either hahahaha i want to copy first and continue the pkn, i think hahaha then i'll study at night hmmnyaaahhh boooorrrrrriiiiiing but yea, i'm off! Bye! :)

hey, i just read one of my good friend's blog, it was adani's and her blog makes me think. her newest post, it's about love and physical contact hahaha a lot has happened to me these days and her blog is a good wake up call hahaha well relax, i'm still a virgin ;)

heeyyy everybody! nyah, finally i'm in a real good mood :) well, sorry i didn't post anything on the rest day of October 6th until now hihihi on October 6th, i thought i need a fresh air so i decided not to post anything, bbbut on October 7th, i was just too busy hahahaha did something good happen? YEA! :):):)

rrgh actually on October 6th he asked me what's wrong, because i wrote at personal message at wlm about my so called disappointment at him, and told him a little and he felt sorry and i knew he was so sorry, well he told me he didn't want to be someone who i don't like and he'd try not to be that someone aww kinda sweet hahaha because i was not in the mood and i didn't want him to feel terrible so i changed the topic and told him that we'd talk about it the tomorrow

so the next day i went to PIM to go for movie with my dear friends and yea, with my adit :) (let's forget about the bad things) so after we got there, we went to Sushi Groove for some Japanese food, then to XXI to but some ticket for I Know Who Killed me (it sucked rrgh), then we splitted up, girls went to Ace Hardware to search a present for my friends, guys went to Timezone for some playground hahaha but i went to Fuji to buy some credit rrgh, having a boyfriend do make me a spender hahahaha well, Adit was accompanying me went down to Fuji ihihi but fuck! the Fuji guy said that XL credits are a big zero rrrgh fuckfuckfuck then adit told me that he could text the guy at his house to send the credits for me, because i really need it, i said yes. so then here came the credit, yeeeey hahahaha then i said thank you, i'll repay you later hunn :) but he said no, he didn't want me to repay him oh goood, that's not right, because i bought a big amount one, but he insisted me, he said it's just once in a while and he'd give my money back if i repay him aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaawwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww how lucky i am :) well, actually i used my credit to text and call him either nyahahahaha but btw, thanks Dit! i love you :)

so then, we went to Timezone to meet up with the boys. because he wasn't playing anything so he stood beside me, then he hugged me, well, he hugged me before. but he said he's sorry for changing to be someone who hurt me aaawww, i couldn't say anything but just hugged him tighter hihihi well, i was holding my tears actually, i couldn't cry there! then he whispered to my ears i love you so much, ran then he kissed my left cheek, fast and sweet. oh God, i was speechless! rrgh tell me i am lame, but that was the first time he kissed my cheek and there were a lot of people there, i'd feel uncomfortable if somebody see us, but thanks God, no one :P well yea, like 5 minutes later i kissed him back, saying i love you so much too, diit! then he hugged me even tighter hihihi i like it, i'm his :)

then we went to the movies studio, took our seat. it's a four seats, so i'm with adit, and Amal with Radit hahaha what a name sound a like hahahahah so as i sit down beside my bf, we held hands :) then i laid my head on his chest, hugging him and he started to play with my hair and rubbing my cheek, oh what the usual adit i love :) i hugged him so tight like i'll never let him go, and i tickled him for a while hihihi i like the way he played with my hair, soft and tender hahahaha i'm blushing noww hihihi then suddenly he moved my hand, from around his waist to around his neck hihihi i didn't mind it, because that way i could play with his hair :) then he continued rubbing my cheek, but suddenly his hand moved to the center, he played with my lip! OMFG, my mind became really racy that time! because if i looked to his face, it's only 5 centi meters away! oh no, did he want to kiss me? nyahhh, his fingers stayed quite long there, and i knew, he was looking at me, and well, i could feel his heartbeat that time, pounding fast. rrgh i didn't what to do, well actually i wanted to kiss him nyahh, but wasn't it too fast? he kissed my cheek for the very first time, then a real kiss? oh am i so lame? old-schooled? nyahhhh i almost turned my face to him, but suddenly remembered what my friend has told me once, don't give him all out, and i was like, hold yourself raan, hold yourself! nyahnyahnyah and then his fingers moved backward to my cheek huff i felt relieved and kinda regret it hihihi but i didn't want make it like a kiss & make up, remember? i was mad at him, soooo i did a good move, right? then, until the movie ended, i stayed on hugging him, well more like clinging on him hahaha and he stayed on holding my hands :)

so after the movies, some of my friends went home or karaoke at Poins Square and i went home too so did Adit. When i talked to my mom inside the car, i smelled something from nowhere that i knew but my mind was working slow nyahhh then when i was home, when i was about to change my clothes, i was kinda shocked? hahaha the smell that i smelled is adit's! oh my oh my, how could it be? hahahaha his smell was on my t-shirt's left sleeve but nothing on the right one hahahha was it maybe because we hugged too much? rrgh i don't know hahaha later i called him and told him about it and he laughed hahahaha but then he told me that he got my smell too on his t-shirt's right sleeve hahahaha silly? uh huh :P and yea, i ended the day with another sweet phone call hihihi finally :)

actually i didn't really talk about it with him because i just couldn't rrgh i was just too afraid to break down in front of him! i know how bad i can be if i have my break down time and i didn't want him to see it rrgh well, i don't regret it either not to talk about it, because it's not his fault only. somehow i think that yea, i was just sooooo selfish! it was lebaran time, and lots of people went to his house so he got busy and i just couldn't understand him that time rrgh i hate it zz well, the good thing is we're fine now and i love it :)

finally, i sleep with a little smile on my face :')

01:06

aaaaaaarrrgh i just can't go to sleep! my mind is still too racy rrrgh fuck it! i need something to make me go to bed, ASAP! blahblahblah i don't wanna lose him :( yea, i say it, i just can't.. oh meen, what's wrong with meeee?? is this have something to do with his dream and Maroon 5 - Nothing Last Forever? godgodgod, please no :( surely, he's not that nice, no way a person can be so perfect. have i mention that he's changed? i hate our phone calls lately, dit :| they are all disappointing and hurting.. there are three phone calls i think, and the last one, completely breaks my heart.. i know you were sleepy and tired, but that was not how we used to end our conversation, no sweet dream blablabla, no i love you, no the usual you :( so sorry, if i'm questioning where are we now, because just in a snap of fingers, you've changed. God tell me, am i dreaming?